You think she’s hot, but instead of complimenting her, you throw in a light joke about what she’s wearing. You’re not afraid to use the Cocky & Funny strategy with women, because it usually works. That’s if you pay attention to what well-known dating coach David DeAngelo has to say on the topic. But if you go off on a tangent and misinterpret what being cocky is all about, it could totally backfire on you.
So here’s what you need to know before you throw her a few “funny” insults.
Cocky Becomes Insulting
Yes, her dress looks like it should be banned in certain countries, but ripping it to shreds with the scissors of your tongue will not be construed as charming to her ears. Look, there’s a difference between softly teasing her about something and taking the humor too far. Bear this in mind: She’ll take to you if you tease, but not if you degrade. To help you discern between the two, test your funny insults on your female friends or sister. If their jaws drop to the floor or their glares burn your eyes, then you shouldn’t risk getting a drink splashed in your face from the sexy woman at the bar.
Cocky Becomes Immature
As David DeAngelo has said, when using Cocky & Funny, you have to ensure that you pair an arrogant comment with humor. What you say has to be funny and make others laugh. Keep this rule in mind to prevent focusing too much on the arrogant side of things or becoming immature. You don’t want her to think you’ve lapsed back in time to grade school and you’re one minute away from pulling her hair or throwing her crayons on the floor. What’s a no-no is dishing her too many cocky comments, to the point where she’s looking awkward and you’re overdoing your approach. Winning a woman with cockiness should not neglect the funny aspect; otherwise all she’ll see is an arrogant jerk.
Cocky Becomes Boring
Sure, you’ve used the cocky approach on other women before, and you clinched success. But that doesn’t mean you should assume those exact words will work on the woman you’re currently eyeing. Making such an assumption can lead you to either believe you’ve got this one in the bag or view her as nothing more than a challenge. She’ll see your efforts as you trying to outdo yourself or impress her. In other words, she’s not going to feel that you’re trying to hit on her to have a conversation, but rather that you’re focused on winning. Prepare for her to turn her attention elsewhere.
Cocky Becomes Mechanical
For any flirting tactic to be successful, you have to adapt it to the situation at hand. Forget going through strategies in your head, where you plan what you’re going to say and how you’re going to say it. This isn’t a comedy lineup with you as the starting act. Doing this adds pressure and kills the spontaneity of flirting. Remember that when you approach a woman, she’ll not only be listening to what you say, but also scanning the energy behind the words. Awkward or strained energy will just make her wish she could pull you off the stage.
Cocky Is Misdirected
When you want to be Cocky & Funny, you might totally forget about your audience, which is a bad idea. Not all women are going to lap up your efforts, just like not all women like tall guys, so you have to tweak your strategy a little depending on who she is. Do this by observing her from afar for hints. Does she seem like an extremely shy girl or a party animal, for instance? Does she seem to be too serious, to the point where she probably wouldn’t “get” your humor? You have to suss her out a bit before you launch into your strategy.
Cocky Is Ill Timed
Then, of course, there’s always the chance that she just had a bad day and wants to be left alone to drown her sorrows in her martini. The last thing she wants is for you to march over and tell her you are sure she wants to spend the night with you. This could be irritating or make her feel like you’re needling her. So when going over to say “Hi,” bear a thought for the fact that you don’t know where she’s at. Try to figure this out in conversation before immediately slam-dunking her into cocky banter.
Cocky Is Overdrawn
Ever heard women moan to each other that some guys just never know when to stop? Avoid being one of those guys by stopping and checking her reaction to what you’re saying. Though you don’t want to bore her with common chatter, you also don’t want to use cockiness to the point where she starts doubting that you’re really interested in pursuing something with her. Your cockiness and humor are useful to grab her attention, but underneath them you should not lose sight of the fact that you want to be building a real conversation and hopefully connecting.